Saturday, August 05, 2006

The Purina Diet

Here's a funny story to hold you 'til Monday!

There once was a man that had a Labrador retriever. He was buying a large bag of Purina at Wal-Mart and was in line to check out and the woman behind him asked if he
had a dog? On impulse, he told her no, but that he was starting The
Purina Diet again, although he probably shouldn't because he'd ended up in
the hospital last time, but that he'd lost 50 pounds before he awakened in
an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of his orifices and
IVs in both arms.

He told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that
it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply
eat one or two every time you feel hungry and that the food is
nutritionally complete so he was going to try it again.

He had to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now
enthralled with his story, particularly the guy who was behind the woman he was talking to.

Horrified, she asked if he ended up in intensive care because the dog food
poisoned him.

He told her no; he'd been sitting in the street licking his uh, er family jewels and a car hit him.

The guy behind the woman, staggered out the door laughing so hard, it looked like he was going to need an ambulance!


  1. Anonymous said...
    Bernita said...
    My husband is like that guy.
    I can just see it now at the local A&P.
    Gordon said...
    HAHAHAHAHA! That is great!
    Sandra Ruttan said...
    Oh, I didn't put up the sanitized version, Bonnie!

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