Saturday, February 11, 2006

Evasion Tactics..or..How to Avoid a Ticket

Have a fun weekend all...Don't try this at home. The participants were of the Nitwit Order-Tenth Degree! LOL!!

A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has the following exchange:

Officer: May I see your driver's license?

Driver: I don't have one. I had it suspended when I got my 5th DUI.

Officer: May I see the owner's card for this vehicle?

Driver: It's not my car. I stole it.

Officer: The car is stolen?

Driver: That's right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the owner's card in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there.

Officer: There's a gun in the glove box?

Driver: Yes sir. That's where I put it after I shot the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk.

Officer: There's a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!?

Driver: Yes, sir.

Hearing this, the officer immediately called his captain. The car was quickly surrounded by police, and the captain approached the driver to handle the tense situation:

Captain: Sir, can I see your license?

Driver: Sure. Here it is. It was valid.

Captain: Who's car is this?

Driver: It's mine, officer. Here's the registration.

Captain: Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see if there's a gun in it?

Driver: Yes, sir, but there's no gun in it.

Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box.

Captain: Would you mind opening your trunk? I was told you said there's a body in it.

Driver: No problem. Trunk is opened; no body.

Captain: I don't understand it. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn't have a license, stole the car, had a gun in the glove-box, and that there was a body in the trunk?

Driver: Yeah, and I'll bet the big liar told you I was speeding too!

Thought To Hold You Over Till Monday

If I want your opinion, I'll ask you to fill out the necessary forms.


  1. Denise McDonald said...
    that's just wrong .... hahahaha
    Anonymous said...
    Yea! A chuckle to start the weekend. THanks, BOnnie.
    WannabeMe said...
    Naughty, naughty, Bonnie!
    Kat said...
    that was great -- wish I would have thought of that a couple of weeks ago when I got my 1st speeding ticket :(
    Bonnie S. Calhoun said...
    Kat, Kat, Kat...tsk, tsk, fast..LOL...were you going!!

    Dana...somethings are just plain funny.'s gotta amke me be funny.

    Yea, Dennie...says the woman who get restraining orders for stalking stars...LOL!!!
    Anonymous said...
    it wouldn't surprise me one bit if you are the one who did this bonnie. hahaha. you never cease to throw me into a constant state of bewilderment. Complete and absolute bewilderment.

    And you call me a nitwit? LOL
    Bonnie S. Calhoun said...
    Shoot, know me too well!!!LOL...Why aren't you in church?
    David Meigs said...
    What a hoot. I'll have to use some of these the next time my wife is pulled over.
    Bernita said...
    I can actually see someone oulling this.
    Mindy Tarquini said...
    Joe said...
    Good stuf!

    When I want your opinion, I'll give it to you.
    M. C. Pearson said...
    Okay, I couldn't get to your previous post but I got to this one! Funny! You so make me laugh. Oh, go to Curmudgeon's Rant he has a HILARIOUS post about his wife...don't drink any coffee while reading!!!

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