Friday, March 10, 2006


I hope you will take these 22 things to heart this weekend as your out causing revelery! Mind you...I don't supply bail money...You do the crime, you do the time!

This is a list of 22 things to NOTsay to the policeman who stops you!

1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer.

2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.

3. Aren't you that guy from the Village People?

4. Hey, you must have been doin' at least 120 mph to keep up with me...Good job!

5. Didn't I see you get your ass kicked on COPS?

6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a cop.

7. I almost decided to be a cop, but I decided to finish high school instead.

8. Bad cop! No donut!

9. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?

10. Gee, Officer...that's terrific...the last officer only gave me a warning too!

11. Excuse stick up hyphenated?

12. Wow, you look just like the guy in the picture on my girlfriend's nightstand.

13. Is it true that people become cops because they're too dumb to work at McDonald's?

14. I pay your salary!

15. So, uh, you on the take, or what?

16. Gee, that gut sure doesn't inspire confidence.

17. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.

18. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around-that's how far ahead of me they are.

19. What do you mean, "Have I been drinking?" You're the trained specialist.

20. Well, when I reached down to pick up my bag of crack, my gun fell off my lap and got lodged between the brake pedal and the gas pedal, forcing me to speed out of control.

21. Hey, is that a 9 mm? That's nothing compared to this .44 Magnum.

22. Hey, can you give me another one of those full cavity searches?


  1. Live, Love, Laugh said...
    There you go again Bonnie, shame on you! Hey I am sorry I haven't been by lately. This is one of my most favorite sites, I just have been having some bitter sweet things goin on in my life and haven't been as faithful at responding to my comments, but I am back now!
    Bernita said...
    We were stopped once - doing a mere 39 over - and worse we had the back seat filled with plants for my daughter's garden.
    You have no idea how suspicious tomato seedlings and such can look.
    Gordon said...
    Try this one, "Sorry officer, I didn't mean to speed, I was just listening to James Dobson and got caught up in the program."

    It didn't work for me either.
    jel said...
    where do you come up with these

    and #22 gross

    you have a blessed day Bonnie :)
    Denise McDonald said...
    HA! ... happy Friday!
    Sandra Ruttan said...
    OMG, too funny! There goes the keyboard...
    Jayburt Delim said...
    This article is so funny. Still, it is base on facts. Nice one Bonnie

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