Thursday, March 22, 2007

by Bonnie Calhoun

It's not Friday yet, but with the way the news is going I'm ready for a recap so that I can enjoy the weekend without interruptions!

I am so tired of hearing about Anna Nicole Smith, that I could gag! It was interesting for a while , but for crying out loud, let her die, er, uh...let IT die. They've asked for DNA from all parties concerned. I don't want to hear any more until they tell me who the straight shooter, er...father is!

Then we have Britney Spears...another gag reflex coming on here. So the girl is bald! That's the ultimate definition of a bad-hair day. *snort* Personally I'd have gone for the baseball hat and kept the hair, but hey...that's just me. I'm old and used to having my head covered!

The girl is in rehab, and rehab, and re-rehab...SO WHAT! I can't understand our fascination (and yes it is fascination or the paparazzi wouldn't be getting rich sneaking pixs) with watching someone when their down and out. Every human being on this earth has had their own JackAss moments, including moi. But they don't need to be documented in living color ad nausem!

Next is the Menu Foods Pet Food Recall, now that one is making people's animals gag...for real. I hear there's a woman that has started a Class Action lawsuit because Menu Foods knew about this long before they started the recall. Locally where I am, this has grown into a crescendo of outrage as pets have been diagnosed as...being dead or ill from the tainted food.

And bringing up the rear is Dancing With The Stars. The big hubbub is about Heather Mills (the X Mrs. Paul McCartney) and her prosthetic leg. People are watching just to see her leg fall of...Now that is just plain sick people! Get a life! And that's my last BIG gag reflex!

Let's talk men and the size of their balls...

After a two year long study, the National Science Foundation announced the following results on corporate America's recreation preferences.

1. The sport of choice for unemployed or incarcerated people is: Basketball.

2. The sport of choice for maintenance level employees is: Bowling.

3. The sport of choice for front line workers is: Football.

4. The sport of choice for supervisors is: Baseball.

5. The sport of choice for middle management is: Tennis.

6. The sport of choice for corporate officers is: Golf.

Conclusion: The higher you are in the corporate structure, the smaller the balls are.

Get your mind out of the gutter....What were you thinking it was about??? Mwhahaha!




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Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Menu Foods Goes To The Dogs

by Bonnie Calhoun

I'll tell ya', you've got to watch every little thing these days. I now have to worry whether some company like Menu Foods is trying to poison my dog. The only reason I say only my dog, is because my cat won't eat wet cat food.

As soon as I heard about the Menu Foods recall, I scurried to their website for a list of the pet food brand names because my dog eats the "cuts and gravy" style food. Poor thing, she's old and not enough teeth left to do much other than gum the food to death!

Now the wild part of the whole story is the famous, or infamous list of brand name pet foods that are manufactured at this same place. There were 50 dog food labels and 42 cat food labels. The companies ranged from the extremely expensive pet food like Iams and Eukanuba, all the way down to the cheap of the cheap, like Cadillac, Price Chopper and Winn Dixie. All at the same place...and you know, all the same formula. So it just goes to show that pet food is basically all the same. Uh, er...hopefully not poisonous!

Thank the Lord, my brand wasn't on there!

Today Menu Foods Income Fund went to the dogs. It apparently went into a free fall nosedive and dropped 45%...just goes to show...you can't mess with people's pets and get away with it, any more than you can mess with people food!


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