by Bonnie Calhoun

It's not Friday yet, but with the way the news is going I'm ready for a recap so that I can enjoy the weekend without interruptions!

I am so tired of hearing about Anna Nicole Smith, that I could gag! It was interesting for a while , but for crying out loud, let her die, er, uh...let IT die. They've asked for DNA from all parties concerned. I don't want to hear any more until they tell me who the straight shooter, er...father is!

Then we have Britney Spears...another gag reflex coming on here. So the girl is bald! That's the ultimate definition of a bad-hair day. *snort* Personally I'd have gone for the baseball hat and kept the hair, but hey...that's just me. I'm old and used to having my head covered!

The girl is in rehab, and rehab, and re-rehab...SO WHAT! I can't understand our fascination (and yes it is fascination or the paparazzi wouldn't be getting rich sneaking pixs) with watching someone when their down and out. Every human being on this earth has had their own JackAss moments, including moi. But they don't need to be documented in living color ad nausem!

Next is the Menu Foods Pet Food Recall, now that one is making people's animals gag...for real. I hear there's a woman that has started a Class Action lawsuit because Menu Foods knew about this long before they started the recall. Locally where I am, this has grown into a crescendo of outrage as pets have been diagnosed as...being dead or ill from the tainted food.

And bringing up the rear is Dancing With The Stars. The big hubbub is about Heather Mills (the X Mrs. Paul McCartney) and her prosthetic leg. People are watching just to see her leg fall of...Now that is just plain sick people! Get a life! And that's my last BIG gag reflex!

Let's talk men and the size of their balls...

After a two year long study, the National Science Foundation announced the following results on corporate America's recreation preferences.

1. The sport of choice for unemployed or incarcerated people is: Basketball.

2. The sport of choice for maintenance level employees is: Bowling.

3. The sport of choice for front line workers is: Football.

4. The sport of choice for supervisors is: Baseball.

5. The sport of choice for middle management is: Tennis.

6. The sport of choice for corporate officers is: Golf.

Conclusion: The higher you are in the corporate structure, the smaller the balls are.

Get your mind out of the gutter....What were you thinking it was about??? Mwhahaha!