Wednesday, March 07, 2007

Church Bulletin Bloopers!

Well good Wednesday. Hump day all the way!! American Idol guys were really lame. It's fgoing to be a girl's contest this year!


They're Back! Church Bulletin Bloopers!

Thank God for church ladies with typewriters. These sentences actually appeared in church bulletins or were announced in church services:

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Bertha Belch, a missionary from Africa, will be speaking tonight at Calvary Methodist. Come hear Bertha Belch all the way from Africa.

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The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.

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The sermon this morning: "Jesus Walks on the Water." The sermon tonight: "Searching for Jesus."

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Our youth basketball team is back in action Wednesday at 8 PM in the recreation hall. Come out and watch us kill Christ the King.

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Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Don't forget your husbands.

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The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due to a conflict.

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Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say "Hell" to someone who doesn't care much about you.

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Don't let worry kill you off......let the Church help.

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Miss Charlene Mason sang "I will not pass this way again," giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.

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For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

4 Comments:

  1. Bernita said...
    Erp!
    Who needs enemies?
    Amy said...
    Thank you for this post I laughed through the whole thing.
    Paula Neal Mooney said...
    Oh the foibles of our fast-typing fingers!
    Mirtika said...
    A long distance belcher!

    Oh, and AI: My hubby said the same thing, and added, "Looks like the last threre are gonna be gals."

    I said, well, the boys may pull a rabbit outta their vocal hats. Maybe.

    I still am rooting for the ladies, especially Lakisha and Melinda. Lakisha was my fave from the auditions, and I said right then, I need me a t-shirt that says, "It's over cause the fat lady sang!"

    I think Lakisha and Melinda just blow the competition out of the water. And three other girls, Jordin, curly-haired gal (forgot her name), and short-haird gal (forgot her name, but she wore a glamorous long gown last week), they're the best.

    Antonella Barba is only hanging on cause she's cute. The girl stinks vocally. And though my hubby likes the tall, dark-haired gal with the color stripe, I'm unimpressed.

    Mir

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