Thursday, December 28, 2006

Lattes and Cold Metal

Good Thursday. I'm still on vacation, so my blog visiting is hit and miss with all I'm trying to get done on my free time. I got this from my buddy Ric. It took me five minutes to stop howing in laughter. I don't know if this really happened on the Tonight Show....but it's good for

A BEVERAGE ALERT!

Jay Leno went into the audience to find the most embarrassing first date that a woman or man ever had. The winner described her worst first date experience. There was absolutely NO question as to why her tale took the prize...

She said it was midwinter, snowing and quite cold, and the guy had taken her skiing in the mountains outside Salt Lake City, UT. It was a day trip, not an overnighter. They were strangers, and after all, truly had never met before. The outing was fun but relatively uneventful until they were headed home late that afternoon.

They were driving back down the mountain, when she gradually began to realize that she should not have had that extra latte. They were about an hour away from anywhere with a rest room and in the middle of nowhere. Her companion suggested she try to hold it, which she did for a
while.

Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and slow going, there came a point where she told him that he had better stop and let her pee beside the road, or it would be on the front seat of his car!

He quickly stopped and she crawled out beside the car, yanked her pants down and started to pee. In the deep snow she didn't have good footing, so she let her butt rest against the rear fender to steady herself.

Her companion stood on the side of the car watching for traffic and indeed was a real gentleman and refrained from peeking. All she could think about was the relief she felt despite the rather embarrassing nature of the situation.

Upon finishing however, she soon became aware of another sensation. As she bent to pull up her pants, the young lady discovered her buttocks were firmly glued against the car's fender! Thoughts of tongues frozen to pump handles immediately came to mind as she attempted to
disengage her flesh from the icy metal!

It was quickly apparent that she had a brand new problem due to the extreme cold! Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor of the mom ent, she answered her date's concerns about "what's taking so long?" with a reply that indeed, she was "freezing her butt off and in
need of some assistance!"

He came around the car as she tried to cover herself with her sweater and then, as she looked imploringly into his eyes, he burst out laughing! She too, got the giggles and when they finally managed to compose themselves, they immediately assessed her dilemma. Obviously, as hysterical as the situation was, they also were faced with a real problem. Both agreed it would take something hot to free her chilly cheeks from the grip of the icy metal!

Thinking about what had gotten her into the predicament in the first place, both quickly realized that there was only one way to get her free. So, as she looked the other way, her first-time date proceeded to unzip his pants and pee her butt off the fender!

As the audience screamed in laughter, she took the Tonight Show prize hands down...or perhaps that should be "pants down."

And you thought YOUR first date was embarrassing?

Jay Leno's comment..."This gives a whole new meaning to being peed on!"


6 Comments:

  1. Live, Love, Laugh said...
    oh my I don't think I would have ever told anyone that story, talk about embarrassing!!! lol
    Bernita said...
    That's hysterical.
    And practical.
    Dennie McDonald said...
    Well - I would hope folks don't try to top that!
    Kat said...
    I'm with live, love, laugh -- I wouldn't repeat this story EVER! what an embarrassing story!!!
    Leann said...
    oh I have one that would top that.but I will let it go.it didnt happen to me but it was sooo embarrassing!!!ALSO FUNNY>
    Joe said...
    Funny with a capital everything!

    and I loved your Kwanzaa post, too.

    Happy New Year!

Post a Comment