Thursday, February 23, 2006

ANNOY YOUR STALLMATE

Thursday...one more day till the weekend...sigh...I'm wishing my life away...but that's the only way to get to Saturday and sleeping in! LOL

Okay Ric...men get a reprieve today...'cause ya'll are so sweet....uhhmmm...my blogging buddy Bonnie Ballpoint Wren has a house full of them....and they're all taller than her aim! You gotta' read it to love it!

Here's one for the ladies today....and I bet a know at least a half dozen of you that would do this...Ladies...sign in please! ROFLOL!!!!


-Stick your open palm under the stall wall and ask your neighbor, "May I borrow a highlighter?"
-Say, "Uh oh, I knew I shouldn't have put my lips on that."

-Cheer and clap loudly every time somebody breaks the silence with a bodily function noise.

-Say, "Darn, this water's cold."

-Drop a marble and say, "Oh poop! My glass eye!"

-Say, "Hmmm, I've never seen that color before."

-Grunt and strain real loud for 30 seconds and then drop a cantaloupe into the toilet bowl from a height of 6 feet. Sigh relaxingly.

-Say, "Now how did that get there?"

-Say, "Humus. Reminds me of humus."

-Say, "Interesting... more floaters than sinkers."

-Using a small squeeze tube, spread peanut butter on a wad of toilet paper and drop the wad under the stall wall of your neighbor. Then say, "Whoops, could you kick that back over here please?"

-Fill a balloon with creamed corn. Rush into the stall with your hand over your mouth and let out a lengthy vomit impression while you squeeze the balloon and splatter cream corn all about. Apologize profusely and blame it on the fettucine alfredo you had for breakfast.

-Say, "Boy, that sure looks like a maggot."

-Say, "Darn, I knew that drain hole was a little too small. Now what am I gonna do?"

-Before you unroll toilet paper, conspicuously lay down your "Cross-Dressers Anonymous" newsletter on the floor visible to the adjacent stall.

-Lower a small mirror underneath the stall wall, adjust it so you can see your neighbor and say, "Peek-a-boo!"

-Drop a D-cup bra on the floor under the stall wall and sing "Born Free."

WARNING: I DO NOT SUPPY BAIL MONEY!!!!

Thought For The Day


Don't look back, they might be gaining on you.

7 Comments:

  1. Donny said...
    I hope you don't think that stuff is new. I invented the d-cup bra trick. I mean...uh...that's a good idea.
    Gordon Cloud said...
    Bonnie this reminds me of something that my mother did once. She had one of those old, "Bag of Laughs" toys that sounds like a man laughing. She took it into a women's restroom and started that thing up. She soon had the whole place to herself.

    This stuff is just too funny!
    Bonnie Calhoun said...
    Donny....excuse me! ROFLOL...the D-cup was around before you were even a glimmer in your mom's eye!

    Gordon, your mom sounds like my kinda' people...LOL!
    Dennie McDonald said...
    sleeping in...? on a Saturday...? what does that mean? Sorry, unfamiliar with that - LOL!
    Shelley said...
    ROFLOL!!!!!!!!!!!

    Oh goodness Bonnie..you had me in stitches...I was laughing so hard I was crying...and I'm still laughing!

    Gordon...your comment just added to the laughs!! LOL!!
    Ballpoint Wren said...
    Dear Miss Bonnie, thanks that shout out.

    Did I tell you I've taken to reading your jokes to the boys at breakfast? The little old lady gasser joke got lots of laughs, but the cell phone one was a real winner. Somehow they heard all the stallmate ones before. Honestly, I need to get out more if they're hearing stuff before I do.
    M. C. Pearson said...
    I'm crying while laughing so hard! I had to call Dave in to look at it...we were both cracking up. Oh man. That's good.

    I sent some emails...I hate my computer. Pray the tax returns get here quickly.

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